Who needs a date on Valentines Day when you've got yourself?

I am pretty good at not only being single, but staying single! Here are of my tips to keeping solo!

  1. Refuse to brush your teeth more then twice a day. That will insure that whatever you ate for lunch will linger and no one will want to kiss you (or get a lick, unless it is your dog).
  2. Only watch old BBC television programs. It will eliminate conversations about the latest "Big Bang Theory" or "Game of Thrones"
  3. Wear the red valet sweat pants (that my Mother HATES) whenever you leave the house. Oh, and only leave the house to walk the dog and go to the grocery store.

4. When out in public randomly start conversations with strangers who obviously do not want to engage in a conversation with you. Everyone else will think your a tad nuts.

5. When walking your dog consistently talk to the pup. At first, people may think you are on the phone but soon they will discover that you are chatting up your dog, and they will steer clear of you.

If you enjoy single life and desire to be alone on Valentines Day, I highly recommend doing one or all of these things.

Oh, bonus tip, wave to strangers while driving! That will creep them right out!