Better Me in 30 Day #12 – Be Kind to Yourself and Other Women
Day 12's challenge actually came from a listener suggestion that we try to go through an entire day without saying/thinking anything negative about ourselves or other women. 50% of that was extremely difficult.
That 50% was the not thinking negatively about myself. I try not to talk negatively about other women regularly, so that wasn't much of a challenge. The times where I talk negatively about another woman are usually times where I'm not feeling confident about myself. I think for many of us cutting down other women often makes us feel like we're building ourselves up. In the end, it really doesn't work that way and just makes you look catty.
Being nice to myself? That was extremely difficult. I internalize negative feedback and let it fester. When I hear things like "you're not trendy," "you're not a leader," "you're always glass half empty," "you're too serious" or "you don't command respect" I get really, really down on myself to the point of feeling worthless. I feel like my opinions, beliefs and goals don't matter at that point.
I'm trying so hard to get from point A to point B and when things don't go my way, I withdraw from everything. Yesterday, I was supposed to make some phone calls to achieve a task. Most of the people didn't answer their phones or couldn't help me achieve my task and I took it really personally. I beat myself up for being too meek, not being a good negotiator and for not having strong enough relationships with these people to deserve a phone call back. That feeling of defeat stuck with me all day and into date night where I found myself apologizing to my boyfriend for ruining date night with my self loathing. I just want to please people and get the job done. I'm still in that funk today so I looked up some tips for being kinder to yourself. I need to give some of these a try today.
Invest In Yourself
I never make time to do this. It's suggested that you spend 15-30 minutes in the morning before work or when you wrap up your day, listening to, reading or watching something that uplifts you.
Again, I rarely do this. I often wake up early to do work, go to work, go home, make something to eat/take a quick nap and start trying to find things for work tomorrow. If you find yourself doing the same thing, set aside 30 minutes to be kind to your body and let the stress out doing something like taking a long bath, working out or reading.
Forget A Mediocre Day By Taking One Small Step Forward Towards Something Positive
If you're feeling like your day is just "meh" or depressing take a baby step toward something you're looking forward too. Research a trip you want to take, grab coffee with a friend you don't get to see often or try a new hobby.
Take A Laugh Break
The great thing about all of today's technology is you can find something funny at the push of a button. Laughing is a great way to release tension and elevate your mood. These two videos always make me laugh: