Missed Connection Monday: October 6th

We've all had those nights. Meet cute boy. Drink too much that we don't get cute boy's number. Lock ourselves out of our apartment. This girl seems to think cute boy who got away could be her prince charming in her hour of despair.

Downtown 10/4 - w4m

At one point I had to whisper in your ear because it was so loud and you couldn't hear me, what did I say? You asked to take me out to wine but only kiss me on the cheek. ;) I really wish you weren't such a gentleman and would've made out with me that night. You told me you would take care of me if I drank too much. That's why I'm posting on Craigslist right now. My friends bought me too many tequila shots for my birthday and I threw up walking upstairs to my apartment. When I finally got upstairs to the door, I realized that my keys are still with the cute bartender who took them away from me after my last shot. I'm hoping that you were attracted to me enough to read this, e-mail me back and help me get into my apartment to clean myself up.

Angela in my apartment complex - m4w - 32 (Boise)

You live in my apartment complex and your name is Angela. We have said hi a few times. You look like you would be down to party and have some fun. How do I know that? Well I live in one of the building's that faces the complex's pool and I've watched you from my window. (Yes, I was watching the night that you and your girls went came down to the pool after it was closed with a half empty bottle of Ciroq and decided that there was no better time to swim topless than when you were drunk. Gotta say, your rack is perfection.) If you think this is you tell me the name of the complex and let's have some fun!

I blocked the drive up post-box, you left me a note (Rite-Aid)

Dear Stranger,

Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for your concern regarding the drive-up mailbox next to Rite-Aid. I assure you that I am well aware that parking in front of a mailbox is rude, but I had no idea that it is also illegal. The simple fact of the matter is I have been struggling through a powerful dose of food poisoning this morning, and as I pulled up my truck today I knew that I had two choices: completely empty the contents of my stomach somewhere nearby (possibly inside that mailbox) or park immediately and sprint to the proper facilities. I opted for the latter, and I stand by my opinion that this was the least rude of all available options.

Nevertheless, I understand and empathize with your consternation at being forced to stop your car and walk five additional feet in order to deposit your doubtlessly priceless parcels and correspondences. Maybe, vulnerable and disoriented outside your vehicle, you found yourself confronted and abducted by a roving horde of the homeless. I accept full responsibility, and apologize without reservation.

Today you were truly the best citizen that anyone can be, and your city, and my dank, damp t-shirt thank you. I will be in contact with the mayor to see if we can arrange for you to be awarded a ribbon, or maybe the keys to the city. No one else has served us as faithfully as you did today.

Please continue protecting us from ourselves,
The Vomitous, Trembling, Shaking and Feverish Truck Driver