Cruise & Box Bachelorette Bet
It's not a typical "who will win" competition. We're going all in. This will end in either tears or vomit and everyone will get to witness it live. Teams have been created and bribery has been dealt.
I have won just one bet against Chris out of about five. This is my moment and I feel like I'm on a roll. It's Cruise vs. Box with teammates to see who Rachel Lindsay, the Bachelorette, will give the final rose to.
UPDATE: Chris just officially lost the Bachelorette bet as Kenny chose to go home to be with his daughter. He couldn't do it any longer. I don't blame him at all. Because of this decision, I am officially the winner because my chiropractor Bryan lives to see another date with Bachelorette Rachel!
Veggies make Chris puke and that's how we will spend time on the air tomorrow. The best part - you'll see it on Facebook live!
On the first episode, Chiropractor Bryan got out of the limo, walked up to Rachel and spoke to her in Spanish. Now, friends, we all know that if there is an attractive person who speaks another language, it's game over. Rachel pretty much melted when Chiropractor Bryan walked away. The two had a moment together and he took advantage of the one-on-one time by kissing her. Hard. He basically ate her face off. Spoiler alert: At the end of the episode, this Spanish-speaking suitor got the first impression rose.
Wrestler Kenny calmly walked up to Rachel and told her that he is a wrestler and then talked about his daughter. Come ON! Single guys: If you have a daughter and you love her and talk about her the way Kenny talked about his little girl, we are hooked. Ugh. Great move, Pretty Boy Pitbull Kenny King. Rachel liked that, too.
Don't, for a second, think that we're going to let this season of the Bachelorette pass us by without throwing out a bet. There's a formula for choosing the front-runner (I just couldn't completely understand it before I chose my winner).
This time around, we're not going at it alone. We have a teammate. Meet Claire. Claire is on Team Box - the winning Team Box. The two of us agree that Chiropractor Bryan will be the one Rachel, the Bachelorette chooses in the end. When we are still in the game by the time Boise Music Festival happens, I'll get Claire into BMF and take her backstage to help me "discover" items in the artists' tents. Last year I got sweaty towels from Nelly, leftover water bottles from almost every artist. This year we're taking things up a notch.
Chris believes his wrestler guy will be the last one standing. Of course he chooses a wrestler. The bet stands. Chris has offered up something a little different. His teammate, Megan also truly believes the wrestler will sweep the show and be the one down on a knee in front of Lindsay with a huge diamond ring from Neil Lane (yeah, I know my Bachelor/Bachelorette shows). Chris will take Megan to Boise Music Festival and, then, in a moment of panic, he added in a Cruise & Box mug and tickets to see any movie of Megan's choice at any point this summer.
So, here we go.
When Chris loses, he will have to eat carrots, broccoli and cauliflower on Facebook live. This sounds lame and I understand. I would think it's lame, too. However, Chris can NOT eat said vegetables without gagging so hard you almost start feeling bad for him. There will be vomit. This is your warning.
If I lose, Chris is bringing in a bird from Birds of Prey that I have to hold. I'm legit terrified of the large-winged-sword-wielding creatures. Here's proof. There will be tears. And sobbing. And becoming a shell of myself.
CURRENT CONTESTANTS ON THE BACHELORETTE
- Adam - Real estate agent from Dallas, TX
Alex - Information systems supervisor from Grosse Pointe Park, MI Anthony - Education software manager from Chicago, IL Blake E. - Aspiring drummer from Marina del Rey, CA Blake K. - U.S. Marine veteran from San Francisco, CA Brady - Male model from Miami, FL
- Bryan - Chiropractor from Miami, FL
Bryce - Firefighter from Orlando, FL
- Dean - Startup recruiter from Venice, CA
Demario - Executive recruiter from Century City, CA
- Eric - Personal trainer from Los Angeles, CA
Fred - Executive Assistant from Dallas, TX Grant - Emergency medicine physician from New York City
- Iggy - Consulting firm CEO from Chicago, IL
Jack - Attorney from Dallas, TX Jamey - Sales account executive from Santa Monica, CA Jedidiah - ER physician from Augusta, GA Josiah - Attorney from Ft. Lauderdale, FL Diggy - Senior inventory analyst from Chicago, IL Kenny - Pro wrestler (and single dad) from Las Vegas, NV Kyle - Marketing consultant from Los Angeles, CA Lee - Singer/songwriter from Nashville, TN Lucas - "Whaboom" from Santa Monica, CA
- Matt - Construction sales rep from Meriden, CT (the penguin suit guy)
- Michael - Former professional basketball player from Chicago, IL
Milton - Hotel recreation supervisor from North Bay Village, FL Mohit - Product manager from Pacifica, CA
- Peter - Personal trainer from Madison, WI
Rob - Law student from Houston, TX Will - Sales manager from Miami, FL
Side note: Where are all the Idaho bachelors?