FitOne Blog: Why Race?

When I moved to the Treasure Valley four years ago, if you told me one day I'd be training for my fourth half-marathon today, I would've laughed in your face.  I ended up hooked and realizing why running has played such an important role in my life.

When I came to Boise I hadn't run for years because of a nagging ankle injury that caused me to quit my college's cross country and track teams after the first year.  After a few weeks of knowing nobody beside the boys I work with at 103.5 KISS FM, I realized how bored I was when I wasn't at the station.  I lived close to Municipal Park and figured if my ankle would let me, a run might be the perfect thing to fill that vacant time.

I was uber happy that my ankle didn't hurt but I was slow, painfully slow.  Realizing that the years of being able to crank out a 5K in under 20 minutes were well behind me, I decided to see how far I could run instead.  8 miles...that was the day I got this crazy idea to run my first half-marathon.  My body wasn't broken after my injury, it had become strong after all the hard work I put in.  Strong enough to take me 13.1 miles if my mind believed it could.  So I signed up for the City of Trees Half-Marathon, bit it in the first mile in classic Michelle Heart form (ask me about it and I'll show you the scar one day) and ended up successfully finishing in 1:48:17.  Well done, mind.  Well done, body. Thank you for staying strong. It was at the finish line where I realized that this was the first time I had been at peace with my body: weight, curves, imperfections and all for the first time in many, many years. 

Believe it or not, I was a quiet kid.  A quiet, smart kid.  A quiet, smart kid that lived in the neighborhood where all the popular kids in our school lived.  Guess who didn't fit in in that group?  The quiet, smart kid.  They picked on me everyday on the bus.  Cross Country practice was my way out of having to deal with them, but it got so bad that when the season was over I refused to come home from school and would sit at the public library until one of my parents could get me after work.

Being young and impressionable, somehow this idea crept into my mind that if I were skinny, I'd be pretty enough to fit in with those kids and the harassment would stop.  If I were skinny, I'd be truly happy.  So I lost 20 pounds in the matter of two months one summer and I probably did it in not such a smart way.  I hit my goal of 90 pounds, but was I happy?  No.  I still saw something else when I looked in the mirror and my body started failing me.  I was passing out at track meets and getting a "DNF" next to my name on my favorite cross country courses.

Luckily, my coaches had plenty of experience with young female student athletes going through the same thing I was going through.  They saw what was happening and with some kind words of encouragement got me back on the right path.  After adopting an internal "food is fuel" mantra, I started putting weight and muscle back on and started hitting times in my events that wouldn't have otherwise been possible.  Their love and understanding helped me realize that I was much happier winning races and making lasting friendships with my teammates than being skinny.  They helped me be proud my body, no matter what it looked like.

Sure, I still struggle with body image from time to time.  What woman doesn't?  But running has helped me conquer those feelings.  Why am I bringing this whole story up now?  When I was at the FitOne kick-off event on Wednesday, I was talking to one of my co-workers about just wanting to get myself back in half marathon shape.  Someone nearby trains girls for shows and said something about "if it jiggles now, it'll jiggle on stage" and doing a 30 minute workout that would change that without ever running a step.  He wasn't saying it to be malicious at all, but I was taken aback for a second.  I'll be honest, I work 10-12 hours a day and a few on weekends, sleep four hours a night and love junk food...I'm never going to be a girl that competes in anything on stage. I'm ok with that. It's never going to be a goal of mine. If I'm 26 and my thighs jiggle a little bit when I run, I'm gonna own that.  I've been blessed with a body that WILL make it 13.1 miles on September 20th if I treat it well and take care of it.

Ladies, if you're at all insecure about your body or what it can achieve, sign up for a FitOne race distance that you think will test your limits this year.  I promise you that you will feel great about your body and what it's capable of when you cross that finish line, no matter how long it took you to get there.  And if you have any doubts along the way?  I'm going to be there for you every step of the way. Get it girl!