better me in 30

Day 12's challenge actually came from a listener suggestion that we try to go through an entire day without saying/thinking anything negative about ourselves or other women.  50% of that was extremely difficult.

Michelle and I walk out of the studio and I'm immediately faced with today's challenge. Dear Self: Do NOT think or say anything negative. I needed to find a diversion.

Random acts of kindness don't have to be a huge deal or cost you a ton of money. Your kindness could be as simple as going out of your way to ask someone how they are doing. However, when you're ask to write down 5 of them and explain your feelings, it's tough to give yourself a pat on the back without feeling like you're bragging.

At the beginning of the year I had this grand scheme to pay it forward as often as I can, but when my ideas to do something big and extravagant for other people fizzled out I kind of abandoned my quest.  This weekend I realized that random acts of kindness don't have to be big or flashy to matter.

Anyone that knows me will tell you my mind is running constantly.  Worrying about the "what ifs" and the "what nexts."  Trying to have an "empty mind" was extremely difficult for me.

I've heard that meditation has been the change busy people need. I'm open to trying anything to calm my mind. The first challenge was to figure out how to meditate. This was quite an experience that ended in an epic fail.

Let’s just go with one bad habit at a time. I may become overwhelmed and not do well so I want to start slow. Geez, I guess we can refer back to the fear of failure.

My first reaction is to gravitate toward my fear of spiders. I wanted to dig deeper. I'm getting into the things that truly consume me when I'm faced with these fears.

My bad habits?  Most of them come back to me being a complete slob at home.

For some reason this challenge brought to mind an episode of One Tree Hill called "The Places You've Come To Fear The Most" which lead me to an awesome quote about facing your fears.